So, originally for my piece I was going to write an open letter to Simon Mignolet (Sunderland goalkeeper for those who don’t know/care) about his unjust outburst aimed at our great club. But, in hindsight I feel I may have come across bitter, though not as bitter as him.
However, on discussing with my brother about an article of my choice, he thought it was about time I properly humiliated myself and exposed my embarrassing shirt names to the masses.
The decision came on Thursday night. I’d received an email from the club informing me of the retro Paolo Di Canio shirt available through the website. I phoned my brother to tell him, as well as informing parents, with the thought in my mind that a) I have a birthday soon (November 23rd) and b) I don’t have a girlfriend/wife/wench to buy me the shirt in question. And as long as I use the phrase ‘wench’ I will only have family willing to buy me a birthday gift. Anyway, on discussing said shirt with family, the same poont was raised by both.
‘At least he’s a manager and can’t leave the club, thus not leaving a shirt out of date!’
To be fair they had a point. When the Premiership started and the names on the shirts became common practice and a joy for all the sales teams across the clubs, I was but an impressionable teenager. The excitement of Sky TV, sexy/cool Des Lynam and Skinner and Baddiel promoted football (pre Euro 96 plastic fans) had gripped me, and I, in my teenage naievety, wanted a name on my shirt. Rumours abound before Euro 96 suggested that Gheorghe Hagi may sign for us and I’d, almost decided on having that name. Hagi never signed, though Paulo Futre did. Thus, knowing enough about football, I thought Futre was a dead cert for a name on the shirt. Weeks later I knew I was wrong. Disasterous, yet I still own the shirt. In ecru (is that a colour?)
The next season I was determined not to make the same mistake. Flair players come and go, West Ham keep steady tough players, not mavericks. With this in mind and maturity gripping me, I knew I didn’t want the likes of Berkovic or someone exciting on my Pony shirt. I had to go for a hard, steady player that would stay. Unsworth…… To be fair, I’m sure he’d have stayed if not for homesickness, though again the follies of youth proved me wrong.
Within a year or two I’d established that names were not a successful or sensible investment. My home shirt in 2000 had ‘God 10’ on the back in homage to my hero Paolo and unless he left and we signed a dire number ten, the shirt was timeless. Unlike the away shirt which had ‘Tihinen’ on the back. Feel free to take the piss on that one.
Since then I’ve pretty much learnt my lesson, apart from the Mascherano/Argentina fiasco I’ve not succumbed to putting players’ names on my shirt. I do however feel now a shirt looks bare without a name on the back and all now have Smudgy on the back.
Apart from of course my new retro shirt, hopefully with Di Canio on the back. And if my family don’t buy it then please all chip in or find me a wench who will buy it for me.
The joys of squad names and numbers… That’s for you Tom!
Good piece Smudgy.
Best shirts with names I’ve ever had were Di Canio 10 on my Fila navy away shirt as worn when he put that goal past a waving French goalie at Old Trafford, but the best one has to be Bonds 4 on any home shirt, a true legend who should have had a stand named after him and hopefully will in his lifetime.
Did any unfortunate out there have a “Camara” or a “McCarthy” shirt?
I’m sorry to do this but your not being completely honest here, I believe there to be a Diamante shirt languishing in your collection somewhere – you did however get it right a few years back with the long sleeved Repka 2 number.