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West Ham fan applies for Manchester United job

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David Moyes Sam AllardyceGood evening,

I write to you directly to confirm my interest in the newly vacant Manchester United managerial post. Whilst my lack of experience will possibly count against me, I’m sure my enthusiasm and persuasive nature may convince you otherwise, in what has been a turbulent time in the club’s recent history.

Now, you may remember that last year I also sent you an application at around the time you chose to appoint David Moyes. Now, whilst I could claim that had you have appointed me in the first place you wouldn’t be in such a pickle, I feel the fact I’m not and am here applying again, going through the correct channels, shows integrity. This is an important characteristic for anyone in such a high profile position.

Also, I have never had any past dealings with David Moyes. Therefore, not only does this mean I am unlikely to inherit any of his mannerisms or behaviours. Also, it means I won’t come recommended by the past manager, something that doesn’t always work in your club’s favour.

As a man with a footballing knowledge background, I would always have my keen eye on the transfer market. However, as an outsider who isn’t coming from another club, I therefore wouldn’t have any favourites, thus saving the board from shelling out over £27million on one of my former players who could be deemed a waste of money.

Finally, I have a good relationship with referees, something I have noticed to be important to your club over the Premier League years. If I can continue to keep that good spirit going, like your club has managed especially at home, then I feel I can benefit your title push next season.

I appreciate you taking the time to peruse my application, and look forward to hearing from you.

Kind regards

Rob Taylor

Future Manager of Manchester United FC

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5 comments

  • Njabulo SA says:

    What is this guy smocking?he’s got a gambling problem bcz he’s not drinking normal who is he to coach Man U.

  • JB says:

    I thought you were going to say that Sam is the Man Utd fan & was applying for the job. He is certainly a friend of Sir Alex

  • JB says:

    A worst case scenario for West Ham, would be for them not to pick up a point from 3 games.
    Whatever Fulham & Cardiff do, it doesn’t matter IF WEST HAM BEAT WEST BROM & MAN UTD BEAT NORWICH, THEN NEITHER NORWICH, FULHAM OR CARDIFF CAN CATCH WEST HAM, WHO’LL BE SAFE, but if West Ham lose at West Brom, then as long as Fulham don’t beat Hull & Cardiff don’t beat Sunderland, that’ll be OK, but if they do & Norwich beat Man Utd at Old Trafford, Norwich go to 35 pts
    If Cardiff beat Sunderland, then Cardiff go to 33 pts
    If Fulham beat Hull, then Fulham go to 33 pts
    If Sunderland beat Cardiff then Sunderland go to 32 pts with 3 games to play
    If after Norwich beating Man Utd, they win at Chelsea, then Norwich go to 38 pts
    Sunderland win v Cardiff, Man Utd, West Brom & Swansea & go to 41 pts
    Cardiff win v Chelsea & go to 39 pts
    Fulham win v Palace & go to 39 pts OR; Hull beat Fulham & then Hull win v Villa, Man Utd & Everton. Just wins over Fulham, Man Utd & Everton would take Hull to 45 pts,
    Villa win v Hull, Swansea & Man City & go to 44 pts
    Swansea win v Saints & Sunderland & go to 42 pts
    West Brom win 3 but lose to Sunderland & go to 42 pts
    Norwich win v Arsenal & go to 41 pts
    A scenario is possible where if all the teams in 13th, 14th, 15th, 16th & 17th win at least 3 games, & if Norwich win 3 & Sunderland win 4, then 41 pts will be the margin, regardless of what Fulham & Cardiff do.
    West Ham must aim for a win at West Brom, & a draw at home v Spurs if Norwich win at Man Utd & Sunderland beat Cardiff.
    In 2003, when Trevor Brooking took over as caretaker manager, & despite not losing another match, West Ham were relegated on a record total of 42 pts. The same could happen here. We finish unbeaten on 40 pts & still get relegated. I cannot stress enough, how import it is, to get 3 points at West Brom, because if Norwich & Sunderland both win, then we may still need another point v Spurs to stay up on goal difference
    And we all know, that with most of your best players gone, a 24 club Championship is a damned hard league to get out of, which is the last thing this clubs needs before moving into the OS

    • JB says:

      Nolan & Sam dropped a division to get us back up. We may not have that devotion if it happens again. COYI!!!

  • JB says:

    It’s Sunderland, more than Norwich, who could be our biggest danger, because they have the better goal difference, & it is possible for them to better West Ham’s goal difference. To get to a cup final, such as Sunderland have done this season, the club had to win 5 games in a row, Sunderland have already done that once this season. They could do it again. Sunderland have already won the 1st game against Chelsea with 4 to go. If Sunderland did this & grabbed 17th position on 41 pts, then West Ham could be 18th on 40 pts. If West Ham were also to get to 41 pts, then West Ham would be sure to finish above Sunderland on goal difference. At the moment this is in our control. Don’t let it get out of our control by needing points against Tim Sherwood’s Spurs & Pellegrini’s Man City!

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